What kind of parent are you?

What kind of parent are you? Are you a tiger mom? A dad who practices attached parenting? Do you hover, or let your kids range free? Do you practice RIE parenting, or use Dr. Sears as your parenting Bible? Do you spank? Put your kid in time out? Let him throw tantrums? Parent her gently?

Why does it matter? Why do so many of us feel we have to define our parenting? As a Christian, I look to the Bible for guidance, and try to train my children to love God and serve him, but even non-Christians are trying to train their kids to be good citizens. As moms and dads, we want the best for our children.

What does the mom want who lets her kids roam free with minimal supervision? To have good kids. What does the dad want who lets his kids work through their emotions with his support? To have good kids.

I firmly believe that all these parenting “styles” can lead to division if we allow them to. I can see so much good in so many of these ways of parenting, but really, I think when it comes to your kid, you have to do what you feel is best. So if that means spanking, then do so. If you feel the need to stay near your child on the playground, go ahead. But please don’t label your parenting style. I know for me, sometimes what works one day doesn’t work the next day, and I have to really know my girls so that I know how to parent them. Also, what works for my oldest doesn’t work for her sisters, so if I chose to only parent one way, I might be doing my children a disservice.

I say all that to say this. Do the best job you can and throw the labels out the window. If you’re a Christian, ask God for help. The task of raising children is a hard one, and I’ll take all the guidance I can get. And whether you’re a Christian or not, ask for help! Surround yourself with friends. Most importantly, enjoy your kids. They’re only little once, and even though some days seem to last f-o-r-e-v-e-r, the years seem to fly by at light-speed. Take the time to notice your child’s strengths. Take him out for ice cream. Take her to the park. Do things with your children that you enjoy and teach them to enjoy the same things! And at the end of the day, know that though you’ll make mistakes, if you’re doing the best job you can, your kids will be fine. They’re warm, they’re fed, and they’re loved. And in the end, that’s really all that matters.